In this episode, I want to talk to you about dealing with loss as an affiliate marketer.
In other words, how do you deal with bereavement?
How do you deal with people around you passing on and dying when you’re trying to build your online business?
Because this is quite a common theme amongst my students.
And the reason for that is because I tend to attract older people to my coaching, and that’s because I teach the boring, unsexy version of making money online.
Where it’s long term thinking, planning ahead, taking things seriously, be methodical, be slow, take it nice and easy.
And that is something that resonates more with the older generation.
The younger generation tend to want to spam and do faster things that make money faster, but inevitably that doesn’t work anyway.
So here you are.
Now with an older generation of customers and students, it means that for me personally, I am exposed to a lot of emails and support tickets where people stall, stop or give up because someone has died.
So I want to talk about this here because obviously I want to talk directly to you because you are my students and the chances are, if you’re listening to this, then the chances are you have emailed me at some point with a message saying, “Hey Philip, my wife died, my husband died, my sister died, someone died, and I can’t do this anymore. I can’t focus, I can’t do this online thing.”
So I want to talk to you about a few things you can do here to help you overcome this so you can keep building a business because it’s very important to be practical in life.
It doesn’t matter what it is because the first thing I want to talk about is prioritizing self-care for a short period.
Because obviously when someone passes away, obviously it’s very upsetting.
Obviously, it’s going to shake up your life in a huge way, not just emotionally, but also practically, because there might be financial issues involved.
There might be inheritance issues, there might be lawyers involved.
You’ve got to deal with funerals, you have to deal with family, old family disputes and stuff, and so much stuff going on.
Obviously, the first few weeks after someone passes, just shut down your computer, spend time with your family, take time off, prioritize you.
Make sure you get enough sleep and exercise and eat well and so on.
Because obviously, ultimately, if you think about the person who passed away, would they want you to suffer?
No. Would they want you to stop eating and sleeping and giving up on all your dreams?
No. So obviously in the beginning, just shut everything down, take some time off and prioritize yourself. Spend time with your family.
Spend time with your nieces and nephews and your uncle, your sisters, your brothers, your wife, whoever.
Spend time with them and just basically take some time off.
But keep in mind your online business, right?
Now, here’s very one very important point.
You’re not falling behind.
One of the immediate worries and one of the immediate emotional journeys people take, is that they feel like they’re falling behind.
Now, I already made a video or a video and an audio about this, so I’ll leave a link right here on the page here now, to the post I did about falling behind.
How it’s just not true. You’re not falling behind. It’s very important to understand that.
So whether you take a week off, two weeks off, a month off, two months off, when you come back to TAO, understand you haven’t fallen behind.
Because nothing’s changed.
It’s as if… Imagine if you didn’t drive for two months, has driving changed?
No. It’s the same thing.
You might need to sort of psych yourself up a little bit to get back on it, but nothing’s changed.
So that’s the first thing.
Take some time off.
Now the second and last thing is the fact that you have to remember that regardless of how you feel, regardless of how much you miss the person who died, regardless of the struggle that ensues afterwards, you have to get back on it.
Because this is the true test, this is the ultimate test of anybody who wants to make money online.
Because business doesn’t stop, and this is the ultimate test for you because can you continue even in the face of personal upheaval?
That is the TRUE test of an entrepreneur.
Why? Because guess what?
It’s going to happen again and again and again and again.
Literally again and again.
Because the older you get, more people around you are going to die.
✅ Your health is going to suffer.
✅ You’re going to have financial issues,
✅ You’re going to legal worries,
✅ You’re going to have family problems,
✅ You’re going to have problems with contractors,
✅ You’re going to have problems with your boss if you’re still working,
✅ You’re going to problems with stuff that happened 30 years ago,
✅ You’re going to have problems with stuff and
✅ You’re going to have issues with depression,
✅ You’re going to have drug addictions,
…and God knows what.
There’s so much stuff that’s going to kick you in the nuts.
Over and over and over again.
That is life, right?
So the important thing is, you have to make a conscious effort to get back on the horse.
Otherwise, guess what?
Yes, you are going to fail. That simple.
Now, what I like to do is to kind of imagine if you can talk right now to the person who passed away and ask them,
“Should I stop my online business because you died?”
And what are they going to say? They’re going to say,
“Hell no. What are you doing? Stop. Get back on it. You’re still going to miss me. You’re still going to hurt. You’re still going to think about me all the time, but I don’t want you to stop working on your dream. I don’t want you to stop working on your passion because you want to build a better future for yourself. It’s a shame I can’t be there, but don’t stop.”
So that’s basically my advice on that because after the pain has passed or pain has dulled enough for you to get back to life, nothing changes.
You get back on it.
And one last comparison, is if you had a regular job.
Imagine if you worked in a regular job, you’ve been there for 20, 30 years or even 10 years, and it’s just a normal average Joe job.
Your wife or your spouse or your brother or your sister or whoever, somebody close to you pass away, and it knocks you on your ass and you are just… It’s a real personal upheaval.
If you have a regular job, are you going to quit that job?
Are you going to simply going to walk away and never work again?
Probably not, because that’s not practical.
What will you do?
You’ll probably get some time off from work.
I don’t know what they call it around the world, but you just call it sort of a bereavement period where you get a week or so off work and that’s normal.
And guess what? What do you do after that?
You go back to work because you have to, because that’s life.
So have that same mindset towards your business online.
Unfortunately, most people don’t.
Most people end up getting so distracted, so sidelined by it that they simply quit, which is a shame because that means that they were destined to fail regardless, because at some point in the next 10 years, someone close to you will probably die.
I hope not, but that is the truth. It’s same for me, same for everybody.
That doesn’t matter if you’re 20 years old, 50 years old, or 90 years old, at some point in the next 10 years, something terrible is going to happen in your life.
Thinking anything else is very naive and it’s very important you understand that because it’s going to happen regardless.
So hopefully this helps. So to sum up, guys, take some time off.
And how much time?
That’s up to you.
But it’s important, don’t take too long because if you come back a year later, then yeah, you have to start from scratch because you’ve probably forgotten everything you learned.
And depending on how far you got with the training, that’s going to be tricky for you.
So, I would recommend get back on it as soon as possible, all right?
And if you are struggling with a sense of guilt or whatever, then simply pretend you’re talking to your partner or your friend, or your brother or sister who passed away.
Pretend you’re talking to them. Ask them what they would want for you and ask them,
“Should I give up on my dreams?”
And they’re going to say,
“No, get back to work. Please get back to work. It’s going to be tough, it’s going to be very difficult, but just get back on it and you will feel better soon.”
So that’s my advice on that. So hopefully that helps. And please do check out my previous post about the idea of falling behind, so you can understand why that is a complete fallacy.
Cheers guys, and I’ll see you inside the community.